How to make an outstanding first impression

M brought a new colleague home for dinner last week. I was happy to meet someone new and eschewed frozen pizzas to cook a real meal. On the menu? Homemade gazpacho, greek salad, warm rolls-- I even cooked turkey for the man!

So they arrive, and we all hang out in the living room for a while and chat. Then it's time for me to turn into Kitchen Princess and impress our guest with my culinary skills. Got up and walked majestically toward the kitchen. I should have just passed on, walked out the front door and not come back, because it was all downhill from there.

The turkey started cooking a little bit faster than I'd expected so I was in a hurry to serve the gazpacho. In my haste I must have balanced one of the bowls on the edge of the countertop; as soon as I'd filled it it crashed to the floor and exploded, drenching me waist down with soup.

Picked up the biggest pieces of glass and tried to nonchalantly leave the kitchen, but my skirt was soaked through and was dripping everywhere, leaving tomato-drenched footprints with every step I took.

So, brilliant thinker, that I am, I closed off the kitchen door, took off my skirt and put it in the kitchen sink. Just a quick wardrobe change and I could be back in a flash to save dinner and my reputation as a normally-functioning human being!

As I was sprinting down the hall to our bedroom a movement caught my eye. I turned to look and my heart sank. In my panic I'd forgotten that the door to the livingroom was still open and provided our guest full view of my half-nekkid gallop.

Gulp.

Double gulp.

Hey, at least he's not a neighbor...