Second breakfast

We were about an hour away from our winter sport destination this morning when B suddenly shouted:

"I'm going to throw up!" and then almost immediately there was a cough, a splash, and squeal from S. I grabbed the bag our lunch was packed in, shook it out and handed it back just in time to catch the second and third malodorous flood.

M pulled over and we stepped out to survey the damage. B had successfully covered the back seat, the dog, himself and his horrified brother. And suddenly, amidst the carnage we realized that this is our new lease car and we haven't switched all of our stuff into it yet.

We. have. nothing. with. which. to. clean. up.

I swung B out of the car and carried him over to the side of the road. Was wiping him down as best I could with a windshield mitt when I noticed M staring into the car with a horrified look on his face. I dragged B back to the car and peered in.

It was spotless.

In case there were ever any doubts: Labradors really will eat ANYTHING.

The truth about German jokes...

B: Hey Mom! A just lent me his joke book! How 'bout I read you a couple of jokes!?

Me: *sigh* OK.

B: Little Karl Heinz points at two dogs stuck together on the sidewalk. "Daddy, what are they doing?" The father answers: "Well son, one dog is sick and the other one is dragging his friend to the hospital."

*blink* Ha! That's funny!

Me: Why?

B: Because dogs don't go to hospitals! OK, here's another one.

Daddy pats his big belly and says "How did I get to be so fat?!" Mama says: "You eat too much". And little Manfred says: "No, I know! Last week I saw Aunt Jule with her head in your lap blowing you up like a balloon!"

*crickets.*

I don't get it.

Me: Yeah. I think it's time for you to give that joke book back to A.

B: You're right-- German jokes just are NOT funny!

Full-body migraine

Am still fighting this virus and am living in perpetual power-save mode. My head is killing me! The pain fills my head and yet it is elusive. Even when I'm being very still and mindful I can't pinpoint exactly where it is.

The other night I felt like I was in the middle of a neurological storm, with tingling and random pain all over my body. Don't know what this virus is, but it's a doozy!

My house is caught up in the momentum of ever-increasing entropy. The laundry baskets are full, the floors are muddy and the garbage cans runneth over.

And I think I'm going to go shuffle over to the couch and rest a while...

*thanks to Natalie Dee for the graphic.

2009 is off to a fabulous start!

Ugh. Jennifer mentioned purging in a comment on my last post-- was this a premonition? Since then we've been experiencing all the joys that a good flu has to offer.

The kids got hit hardest: high fever and all kinds of gastric drama. S finally turned the corner yesterday but B isn't out of the woods yet. The poor kid didn't have any fat reserves to begin with, so after three foodless days he now looks like a concentration camp victim. or maybe a supermodel. Take your pick.

Luckily M and I didn't get hit as hard, but we haven't been feeling all that great either. And the biggest insult of all? I stepped on the scale this morning thinking that I'd surely lost a holiday kilo or two-- Zip. Nada. Nichts! There's got to be a punchline in here somewhere...

Happy New Year!

Hi everyone I'm still here. We had a bunch of guests over the holidays-- it was fun and noisy and I'm glad they were here, but it's also nice to have the house back to ourselves.

Have also been hit by a cleaning /organizing mania for some reason. Am going through all our closets and shelves and am getting rid of anything that we're not using. It's a relief to be starting out 2009 a bit lighter and more organized.

Hope you all enjoyed the holidays and are back into the swing of things!

Yule tide cheer

Multiple choice quiz

This tree:

a. is 9 feet tall and there were no ladders in the vicinity when it was decorated

b. is not yet finished

c. was decorated by two young elves who placed everything at their eye-level or below and declared it the most beautiful tree they'd ever seen. :-)

Happy Holidays from our family to yours!

So he DOES have ears!

Is it just me or did S age by about 2 years in the last hour and a half?

Last minute save

B had to bring in a craft to do with his class as part of Advent. So over the past couple of weeks the anxiety level has been building around here because he's convinced that this one activity could make or break his reputation as an utterly cool guy.

Those of you who remember my own anxiety-laden attempts at being artsy can probably sympathize with the dread I've been feeling about coming up with something which is "just right" when B's entire social future is at stake. I mean, really, I would like to become a grandmother someday!

And then suddenly, VOILA! I had a brainstorm between glasses of Tempranillo. Marshmallow Snowmen, Ahoy! Now let's just hope his classmates think they're as cute (and tasty!) as he does!

Boys...

S and B spent this afternoon sledding down a huge hill near our house with other neighborhood kids. I walked out there to bring them a snow hat and was met halfway by S trailing a crowd of children. He was crying and there was some blood on his face. Apparently he'd been sledding too fast and flipped over, bit through his lip, broke off the top of one tooth and chipped another. (of course these are permanent teeth. and of course he's the one who had a perfect bite. at least up until this afternoon.)

By the time we got home he'd calmed down and went to the mirror in the bathroom to inspect the damage. When I came in he was smiling really big and bubbled over: "Man! Am I going to have a great story to tell in class tomorrow!"

*thanks to "Me and my Oneyes" for the use of this image.

Dear God make it stop!

Hello from somewhere in southern Holland. We're on our way to Oma's and Opa's to celebrate Sinterklaas. The drive hasn't been any more arduous than usual, but I'm really ready to get out of the car and escape my increasingly restless family.

In order to keep the peace M instituted a system in which each of us gets a turn choosing a song to play on the CD player. Which might have been a fine except for the fact that he kicked it off with an extended version of "Freebird". I think I might have had a stroke sometime during minute 11.

But then B was next. His choice? A track from his children's Audibon bird calls CD. Think garden finches on Meth. With bullhorns.

I'd probably be stringing myself up with the seatbelt if there were any rafters available...

Ye Olde Street-Cred Duds

B is procrastinating his math homework at the livingroom table.

Hey Mom, did you see that kid today? The one with the baggy jeans hanging down so that you could see his underwear? Crazy, huh?

Yes, I did, actually. B, please do your homework.

Yeah. I wonder what he was thinking? You see kids wearing their pants like that, but you don't often see it on adults.

B? Your homework?

Maybe it's because those pants are too small for adults and wouldn't be baggy on them.

B!

Unless the adults were very small, of course.

???

Like they used to be in the 1700's...

Now more dangerous than ever!

We've had a busy weekend-- S and B belatedly celebrated their birthdays and we took 8 kids to the theater to see the Meerkats. It's a documentary for kids and follows the life of a family of Meerkats who are living in the Kalahari desert. The footage was amazing-- some parts of it were filmed in the animals' burrows including a scene where they were being chased through the tunnels by a cobra!

Speaking of the dangerous creatures, S and M completed another exam on Saturday for Taekwando and have now earned their yellow / green belts!

Storytelling at its best

I love NPR and thanks to the wonders of broadband Internet I listen to Morning Edition and All Things Considered every day.

Every Thanksgiving a southern Georgian author named Bailey White shares one of her short stories. Her style recalls that of Flannery O'Connor, and her voice and accent bring back warm memories of my own southern relatives. This tale is such a treat-- ENJOY!

Stand by me!

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Today's not a holiday here so we'll be caught up in the normal routine. I think, though that I'm going to run out and buy a couple of turkey breasts to cook up-- maybe I'll force everyone to sit through a dramatic reenactment of the pilgrims' first year. ;-)

You'll probably all be cooking all day today-- may your turkey be tender, your onions perfectly caramelized and the wine good and copious! :-)

I saw this clip over at Linkateria and loved it:

"Stand by me" is a featured song around the world in which 37 musicians from five continents assemble together to create one unified track. The musicians have never met in person and connect through their music. Each track is added to the song as the musicians are recorded LIVE outside across the globe. The end result is a remarkable human connection and a powerful song.

Guardian angel

This afternoon I walked down and met my kids halfway on their walk home from school! Passed the bullies on the way and we all gave each other the evil eye.

S and B were bubbling over to see me!

HI MAMAAAAAAAA! What a nice surprise! Hey, and you're the second person looking out for us today!

Oh really? Who was the other person?

We'd noticed Y's dad following us, but when we turned around he stepped behind some bushes!

This was the dad who scared off the bullies yesterday and brought S and B home. I just called his house to thank him-- his wife laughed when I told her I think he's wonderful, and said she thought so too.

She also said that there's another mother who's noticed these kids bothering smaller children on the way home, and we've all decided to report every incident to the parents and the school. This is the first time in a while that I've felt empowered about the whole situation...

Maybe there is hope for the world?

Here we go again...

My kids were bullied on the way home from school today. The two hyenas from S's class spit on them, kicked them and pushed B out into the street. A parent drove by, chased the bullies away and brought S and B home in his car. Both were crying, B's new pants were torn up and he had a scrape all the way down his shin.

I was livid and drove straight to confront one of the bullies and his mother. She and I know each other through the school, and she invited us in so that we could all discuss it calmly. It all started out with everyone claiming that the other one started it, but within a couple of minutes the boy tripped up in his story and started crying. The mother realized that he was in the wrong and made him give B EUR20 from his allowance to pay for his pants.

The other mother then showed up and we all continued the discussion, but this time it went differently. The other boy is a superb actor and feigned surprise that we were even discussing this at all. He still maintained that it was S and B who started the whole thing. And then that it was someone else. His mother was furious with him, furious with me, and furious with my kids. How dare they bother her child?!

This kid bullied a little girl out of B's class a couple of weeks ago, but when I brought it up she just refused to listen. "I know my son is no angel, but he's definitely not aggressive!" Even though I've seen him be so with my own eyes!

I don't understand what's going on here! We are not living in an urban environment where one would expect this kind of aggressive nature from elementary school children! I feel completely helpless-- on the one hand I want to be able to foster my kids' independence and let them walk home alone from school. On the other hand, I need to know that they're safe and secure and not being accosted when I'm not there!

When I called M to tell him what happened his first response was: "Why does this type of thing always seem to happen to our kids?!" But I don't think it's just us-- it seems to be happening to a lot of people, and no one does a damned thing about it!

Is it just Germany, or does this type of thing happen in other places as well?

Vegalicious!

I was craving comfort food this afternoon for lunch and was thrilled to find this recipe for Pumpkin Gnocchi over at Vegelicious. I'd been searching for a good way to use a beautiful Hokkaido squash that I bought at the farmer's market and wanted to cook up something wholesome and healthy. For the children, of course... ;-)

The gnocchi had a great color and texture and the sauce gave a kick to the traditional mild flavor. It turned out just as delicious as it looks / sounds.

The only downside is that I couldn't stop eating them and am now so full I can hardly move!

Pumpkin Gnocchi

Ingredients:

* 1 cup pumpkin, cooked and mashed (1 small pumpkin, about 2 pounds or 1/2 kilo)
* 2 cups flour
* 1/2 teaspoon allspice
* 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
* pinch garlic powder
* pinch cayenne pepper
* 1 clove garlic, minced
* 2 tablespoons olive oil
* 1 tbs. soy margarine
* 1 tbs. red chili pepper
* 1 tbs. vegetable bouillon powder
* 12 sage leaves
* 2 teaspoons nutmeg
* salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

1. Cut the pumpkin, if it is organic you can leave the skin on, if not, cut away the outer parts, de-seed and cut into medium size chunks.
2. Place them in a pot with very little water and steam them until soft..is only about 5 minutes or so.
3. Remove from the heat and puree or mash with a potato masher.
4. Add the pinch of garlic powder, the pinch of cayenne pepper, 1 tsp. of nutmeg, 1 tablespoon of olive oil and the allspice and mix well.
5. Slowly mix in flour and knead until it forms a smooth dough. If it is too wet, add a bit more flour until it is a smooth ball of dough.
6. Let it rest for 30 minutes.
7. Divide the dough into bite sized pieces.
8. Mark them with a fork.
9. Cook them in boiling water until they float
10. In a smaller sauce pan, saute garlic with olive oil and soy margarine.
11. Add the red chili pepper, the vegetable bouillon powder and the sage leaves.
12. When ready to serve, pour the sauce over the gnocchi and mix well.
13. Dust with cinnamon and grate a bit of soy cheese over the top.

2008: Year of the Tick

Remember this? And this? Now it's my turn. :-P I've got a great big Borreliose bullseye on my thigh.

Generally the danger period for ticks and Lyme's disease ends in September. Which means I also haven't been giving Disaster Doggie her anti-tick meds and she's been bounding around unprotected for almost 2 months. Given her track record with health disasters and the fact that half the humans in her household have had it I'm not taking any chances. Will take her in to the vet for a blood test on Thursday. *sheesh*!

I'm also a little freaked out about Lyme's in general. S and M haven't had the symptomatic rash, but 20% of the people who are infected never get it! I guess the only thing I can do is just be vigilant and have them see a doctor if they ever start having headaches / joint pain / partial facial paralysis, but the problem is that by then it's usually too late.

This is just another one of those things that's better not to even think about or else it will drive me nuts!

Vacation photos

Our camera died just at the end of the vacation, which might not be such a bad thing-- maybe the new one will be able to take pictures without a date stamp!

Niiiiiiiicccccccceeeeeeeee.

Remember this kid? He and his brother are apparently the main suspects in an explosion in a local parking garage last Sunday. Luckily no one was hurt, but the damage topped EUR 10,000...