S is growing fast and will be needing a new winter jacket soon. The other day he mentioned that he likes multicolored snowboarding jackets and that he'd like something bright and colorful. This is the first time he's ever mentioned any preference regarding clothes, so on Monday his Oma and I went with him to the mall so that he could pick out a jacket.
We were browsing the outerwear section when he found it: a really cute jacket with bright, cheerful red, white and blue blocks. He tried it on and his eyes sparkled as he admired himself in the mirror. He had found his holy grail. On the way back to the car he had a spring in his step and obviously felt very "cool"! Oma winked at me and said: there goes a great jacket with a very happy boy in it. :-)
Yesterday S and B had a dentist appointment so I picked them up from school early. S hopped into the car and dissolved into tears. When I asked what was wrong he said that everyone had laughed at him because he had a "girls' jacket". Apparently one of his classmatess said: "Wow, S, nice jacket!" and when he said "Thanks" he rounded it out with: "...for a girl!" S walked around in a t-shirt for the rest of the day. It's -10 degrees outside.
After the dentist I took him back to the mall where we returned the jacket. He was so relieved and today he's wearing his old black jacket and is feeling safe and anonymous again.
I know we can't shelter our kids from this sort of situation, and that by knowing I've got his back he's stronger for it, but I just keep remembering his humiliation and his tears and it breaks my heart...
4 comments:
Grrr! What a shame.... life shouldn't be this way. But you know, the fact that you've got his back means that it might not be this way for him forever.
Thanks! You know what? School went fine today and he seems totally OK. I'm the one who is still angry about this.
I'm afraid it's just one of those awful adolescent moments that we all have to go through in order to hopefully become resilient, healthy adults. I just wish it didn't have to be like this...
Just because there are events we have to go through that test our character doesn't mean that they are enjoyable, or that it's wrong to wish that they might end. Seems like you've had a storm of them recently... hang in there; they will pass and soon it will be sunny and warm again. In the meantime, vodka? Sending hugs your way!
:( :(
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