29 March, 2009

Negative space

Even as a child I was fascinated by negative space, whether it was the aesthetic patterns created by overlapping branches or the optical illusions found within the pages of my puzzle books.

Lately I've been following a guided meditation by Jack Kornfield, which provides guidelines for cultivating an expansive mind. If you get right down to it, all sounds, thoughts, emotions and even images arise and then disappear without a trace. If you close your eyes and clear your mind, it becomes increasingly easy to sense the point at which a sound or thought begins and ends, and the vast, empty space that surrounds it. It is possible to relax into this space, and Kornfield maintains that it can even become so familiar that it will eventually feel like "home".

This has been a revelation for me because I've been thinking a lot about mortality lately. Despite 2 powerful chemo blasts, Michiel's cousin is losing his battle against cancer. And then over the past couple of weeks I've been reconnecting with a favorite teacher from UF and have been saddened to hear that her husband is dying of a brain tumor. And then of course, there's my volunteer work at the nursing home, which, however rewarding, is still a constant reminder of the precarious nature of this mortal coil.

The compassion I feel for these people is powerful and at some moments overwhelming, and yet there is peace and clarity to be found in the space between these emotions.

Lately I find myself focusing less on what I cannot do, and more on what I can. I cannot cure cancer but I can lend a sympathetic ear to a distraught mother. I cannot heal my beloved dog's limp but I can hike with her in the fresh air and ensure that she enjoys her time between bouts of stiffness. I can do nothing about dementia, but I can take the time to feed a patient his entire lunch and leave him with a full belly. I cannot provide any guarantees for the future, but I can make sure I cherish the present.

I am slowly learning to inhabit negative space and this is having a profound positive effect on my life...

6 comments:

Bob said...

This was very interesting! I've been thinking about trying out meditation. Would you recommend this CD for someone who wants to begin?

honeypiehorse said...

Good for you. I'm a huge fan of meditation (not that I ever do it or anything) and I love your focus on what you personally can do. That's where it all begins. Acts of patience and compassion jack up the collective consciousness a notch, making it a nicer neighborhood to live in.

anno said...

I think the people in your life must count themselves fortunate to have you around. Reading this post was like finding one of those spaces, like finding treasure.

Anonymous said...

You have illegally used that image, which is copyrighted. Hotlinking is theft, and crediting a copyright image doesn't get around the issue. Very ironic on a blog about doing positive things in your life.

Betsy said...

anonymous:??? I not only left the link intact, but I also credited about.com at the end of the posting. I am always very careful about providing proper attribution.

Since this is a personal blog and I'm not earning any money with the postings I don't see where I have caused any harm...

Astrid said...

A beautiful post and inspiration Betsy.